replacements.json

[{
  "pattern": "mill?enn?ials'",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "snake people's"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "mill?enn?ials",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "snake people"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "mill?enn?ial",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "snake person"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "the cloud",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "the big data ghost in the sky"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "the clouds",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "the big data ghosts in the sky"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "cloud",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "butt"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "James Adam Buckland",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "bucklandia"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "Benjamin Zweig",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "banjo man"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "Danny McClanahan",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "dreamy man"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "sausage fest",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "artisanal meats faire"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "deep( |\\-)learning",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "cultural appropriation"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "machine( |\\-)learning",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "colossal squid attacks"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "an artificial intelligence",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "a vaporwave god"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "artificial intelligence",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "the vaporwave god"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "an AI",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "a vaporwave god"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "AI",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "the vaporwave god"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "(the |the technological )singularity",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "reaching orgasm"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "a (technological )?singularity",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "an orgasm"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "(technological )?singularity",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "orgasm"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "donald ([^\\\\s]+)? trump",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "angry orange man"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "devil's advocate",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "being a huge asshole"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "hacker",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "necromancer"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hackers",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "necromancers"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hacked",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "necromanced"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hacking",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "necromancing"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hack",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "skeleton"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hacks",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "skeletons"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "an app",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "a terrible baby"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "app",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "terrible baby"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "apps",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "nightmare children"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "hack",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "fuck"
  },
  "fullWord": false
}, {
  "pattern": "algorithmically",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "coding interview-wise"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "algorithmic",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "coding interview-like"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "an algorithm",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "some coding interview thing"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "algorithms",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "coding interview things"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "algorithm",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "coding interview thing"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "an API",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "a Chaos Emerald"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "API",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "Chaos Emerald"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "APIs",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "Chaos Emeralds"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "an SDK",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "a door to the abyss"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "SDK",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "door to the abyss"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "SDKs",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "doors to the abyss"
  },
  "fullWord": true,
  "strictCaps": true
}, {
  "pattern": "debate",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "dance-off"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "self driving",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "uncontrollably swerving"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "poll",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "psychic reading"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "candidate",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "airbender"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "drone",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "dog"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "vows to",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "probably won't"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "at large",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "very large"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "first-degree",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "friggin' awful"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "second-degree",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "friggin' awful"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "third-degree",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "friggin' awful"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "an unknown number",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "like hundreds"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "front runner",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "blade runner"
  },
  "fullWord": true
},{
  "pattern": "no indication",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "lots of signs"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "urged restraint by",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "drunkenly egged on"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "horsepower",
  "replacement" : {
    "text": "tons of horsemeat"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "witnesses",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "these guys I know"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "witness",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "this guy I know"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "allegedly",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "kinda probably"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "new study",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "tumblr post"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "rebuild",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "avenge"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "space",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "spaaace"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "google glass",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "virtual boy"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "smart\\s*phone",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "pokédex"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "electric",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "atomic"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "senator",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "elf-lord"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "election",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "eating contest"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "congressional leaders",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "river spirits"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "homeland security",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "homestar runner"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "could not be reached for comment",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "is guilty and everyone knows it"
  },
  "fullWord": true
}, {
  "pattern": "political correctness",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "treating people with respect"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "alt-right movement",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "white supremacist movement"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "the alt-right",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "white supremacists"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "alt-right",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "white supremacist"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "russian",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "Mordorian"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "russia",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "Mordor"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "israeli",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "p⁠alestinian"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "palestinian",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "i⁠sraeli"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "israel",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "p⁠alestine"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "palestine",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "i⁠srael"
  }
}, {
  "pattern": "super\\s*bowl",
  "replacement": {
    "text": "superb owl"
  }
}]